I took a shot of cocaine, and shot my woman down.

"A check comes in the mail, 150 dollars. We get ready, walk out the door, and into the car. First stop the bank, cash the check. Then a few blocks down, to the store, and buy some alcohol. Something cold, and tasty that we can drink in the car. We pay for the alcohol, and leave. Into the car, onto a country road. drive to all the small towns within a 50 mile radius. While he drinks a beer, i drink mad dog 20 20 "Red grape wine". We hit Taylorville, Decatur, the bigger towns near us. He stops to pee on some bum fuck road, and i have to hold it. Here comes a gas station, in the town of who the hell knows. i go in, hurry up and use the restroom, and get back in the car. We've used over a quarter tank of gas, and with gas prices at 1.87 we had better start headed back. We finally arrive at our little yellow house, with my beautiful white lilly's in our barrels along the drive way. We park under the car port, get out. Fight loudly about who gets to go to the bathroom first. The nosie neighbors peek out their curtains at us. We unload the car, and unlock the door to the house. He goes in and plays his war games on the computer, i sit down on the bed and go through my DVD's. I pick out "Riding in Cars with Boys" because it always makes me feel better about my life. Half way through the movie, he walks in and says "Let's Go!" and i say "Where?", "YOU KNOW!" he says trying to act sneaky. As if i don't know where, but i act like i don't, because i wish i didn't know. I get up, put my shoe's on, get my jacket and slip into it. Grab the keys and walk out to the car. Drive down the street to the stop sign, make a right to the stop sign, then a left at that stop sign, go straight threw the light. Until the next stop sign, then we turn right, and a quick left on 2nd. and head straight about 4 blocks. glad the house is so close to ours, i sarcastically thought. we pull through the drive way, and into the back lot. i park by the tow away sign, as always. we get out and walk up to the back basement door, and go on in. He knocks, and you hear a female voice say "Who is it?!" as if she was trying to sound scary. "Mark and his girl" he says in a weak voice. She opens the door, and pulls us in. First room the kitchen, "Where the business goes down" but we're not supposed to know that. Next room, her bedroom "where the smoking goes on" and there is always a stupid porno on. We sit, there's usually some weirdo there, staring at us..... I memorized to myself.... he hands her 20 dollars, and she says they have to go somewhere to get it. But of course i have to stay. So she gets ready and they leave, i sit there. Stare at the floor, and think quietly to myself. "Why am i here? Why do i put myself through this, EVERY TIME! Your so dam stupid, why would anyone choose this? How do people become crack addicts? It's not like it could be an accident. Oopse i accidentally smoked crack today, How'd your day go sweet-heart?" I imagined someone saying that and gave a small chuckle. By now i've memorized the tiles, so i look around the room. The clock says its 8:00 p.m. I smell a sweet smell, but its unpleasant, it makes me feel sick. A smell of cheap liquor, Cheap perfume, and Drugs. I think a song, by journey that talks about walking at night in the shadows, and smelling a similar smell. I wondered if it was about a Crack Whore? or maybe it was just about some prostitute. "She walks at night, making money, even though the acts just aren't right." i think to myself, wondering if it would make a good song, or if it would flop. Just then they come walking in the door, i look over and the clock says 8:30 p.m. and i wonder what they were doing for such a long time. They hurry to her pipe and clean it, "Where's the chores" mark says to Bernidet "Look under the chair" she says quickly as if she wanted the words to come out even quicker than they did. I sit and stare at both of them, i feel Hurt, i feel alone. I can feel my eyes well up, i turn my head to the side so no one see's. I wouldn't want either one of them to know that his drug use effected me so. I had told him plenty, but couldn't possibly have gotten through to him. They stick the little white rock into the pipe, lean it upward while lighting it, so as it doesn't fall out. "How can something so small be worth so much?" i think to myself, which leads me to think about "How can something so small effect so many people so negatively?" Bernidet puts in a movie her boyfriend rented, finally i had something to do, rather than just sitting there thinking. I couldn't stand letting those drugs take advantage of me that way. I cant stand to let people know how i feel, because i believe that if they know, they'll use it against me. Like mark does. no sooner had the thought passed my mind when i hear them whispering about another 20. I knew he'd spend all the money, as he'd done time and time again. I knew if i went home i'd worry about him, so i stayed. I watched him smoke away 80 dollars. We hadn't even bought food, or cigarettes yet. Mark stood before me, Pale white, eyes wide open but pupils small. I Don't say one word, i stand up, we get in the car and go home. "

And that is one section of the story i've been working on. I have yet to go back and add detail, or edit it to perfection. But give me your thoughts on it.. thanks -Jess